Profile - priapus

I would describe myself as:
Married, spontaneous, honest, (relatively, obviously) Apart from that I'm tall, broad and contrary with no redeemable features. I have been accused occasionally of possessing a sense of humour, a charge on which any mediocre barrister could have me acquitted. I'd probably be best described as a challenge - a term suggested to me by an estate agent friend who has lots of time these days to dwell on such matters. Not as smart as I'd like to think I am.

My ideal partner would be:
Hard up, or someone addicted to poor choices who has endured years of unsuccessful therapy. Failing that, a grey-haired intelligent woman with a sense of humour.(Someone who doesn't think the Diet of Worms is a weight-loss programme, or the Gettysburg Address begins with www.) I know, Catch 22, isn't it? May I, at this point register my objection to all those silly little boxes where someone does ones thinking for them? How important is intelligence? Important I'd say, unless you're a battery hen or a Daniel O Donnell fan. They become sillier - Favourite band? Gastric,Rubber, Elastic, Wedding (ugh)

My ideal date would be:
A stroll on a deserted beach followed by lunch in a country pub with a real log/turf fire - NOT.In any event, all those beaches are jammed with couples from Another Friend; same with the country pubs. Another thing - what's wrong with a coal fire?God Almighty, isn't Ireland really going to the dogs? - nearly everyone here is divorced or separated.