Chick Flicks have often been put down as trite, sappy, emotional, clichéd, melodramatic, weepy, and trivial. But I'd like to propose something different — I'm convinced that we can learn a lot from chick flicks when it comes to dating.

Now, I know that might sound a bit ridiculous, but bear with me. Chick Flicks are such a huge part of the film industry these days, so I don't think their influence can be discounted. We must see something in them, right? Well, I think that 'something' is a valuable insight into what we want from dating and relationships.

Of course I'm aware that the plots of most Chick Flicks are exaggerated and over-simplified in a lot of ways, so why am I suggesting that we use them as a guide for our own lives?

Well, you'll agree that, for the most part, a Chick Flick's main goal is to balance humour, romance, and relationship issues. The balance may not always be believable, but they technique they've used is an excellent one — by maintaining a balance, and making sure that problems don't outweigh humour, they make sure that the film as a whole is an enjoyable experience. So what I'm suggesting is that we all take the same approach. Make every effort to make sure that you don't let the bad parts of your life take over the good parts. It won't work for every situation, I know, but for most people's day-to-day life, it's a good attitude to have; a positive attitude can make a huge difference to the way your day plays out.

So how do we apply this to dating? Well, I want you to think of a Chick Flick that exemplifies your idea of the perfect date / relationship. (Preferably, pick one that's close enough to your reality to be a possibility.) What is it that you like about the film? What tone does it take? Is it funny? Romantic? Serious? A mixture of all those things? Or something completely different?

The next time you go out on a date, I want you to remember that film, and model your own behaviour on it. Try to act as though you were a character in that film, and create a similar atmosphere for your own date. With any luck, it'll help to bring your dream date that little bit more of a reality!

Choosing a character to model yourself on in circumstances like this is called the 'archetype' technique, and it's a fantastic way to build your confidence and have some fun. I use archetypes all the time, myself — my favourite being Monica from Friends, who helps me get the housework done! (Maybe not the best archetype when it comes to dating, though...)

Best of luck with your next date!

We all have our own idea of what a Dream Date would be, and they all vary wildly. Do you go for tall, dark and handsome? Short, blonde and bubbly? Quiet, mysterious and clever? There are as many different concepts of the 'perfect person' as there are different people in the world, and that's a huge part of what makes dating incredibly fun and incredibly frustrating at the same time. While it's great to get out there and socialise, it can also start to feel a bit hopeless when you seem to keep attracting the wrong kind of person.

So this week, I want to talk about strategies for helping you attract your ideal match. Yes, really, there are plenty of things that you can do to give yourself a better chance with the man or woman of your dreams — there's no need to just sit around hoping they'll notice you any more!

First of all, I want you to think about the kind of person you'd define as your Dream Date. Would you like someone funny? Someone tall? Someone successful? Someone outgoing? Someone quiet? What characteristics make you want to date someone? If you had to describe your dream man or women in five sentences, what would they be?

Yes, that's all very well, you say. I want Johnny Depp's head on Eric Bana's body, with a doctor's brain thrown into the mix. Or Keira Knightley's head on Jessica Alba's body, and she should want to go for twenty-mile hikes every weekend. That bit was easy. But how do I get someone like that to notice me?

Well, did you ever hear the saying 'like attracts like'? It's very relevant here. Imagine the kind of person that your Dream Date would go for. What do you think they'd be like? Do you fit their match? If your answer is, 'Oh wow, yes!' then great, go for it. There's nothing stopping you! However, if your answer is, 'I don't know...' or even 'Absolutely, positively, certainly not!' then don't worry. Seriously. There are plenty of steps that you can take to make yourself more like your Dream Date's Dream Date! Take a look at my tips below:

1: Be Interesting.
Get yourself interested in things. When I say things, I mean reading, films, music, hobbies. The more activities you do the more interesting you become, and the more you'll have in common with other interesting people. If your Dream Date is clever, they'll probably prefer the company of clever people. If they're really into art, it makes sense that they'd like to spend time with someone who also does. There's no point in saying, "I want to date a novelist who paints portraits in their spare time," if you never read books and don't know a paintbrush from a toothbrush. People like to share interests, so by developing your own you'll become a lot more attractive to people who do the same.

2: Take Care of Your Appearance.
It is important to keep yourself presentable, and I've talked about the benefits of looking good for dates before. You don’t have to be catwalk model material, but it’s good to have as many advantages as you can when it comes to trying to impress your Dream Date. Looking after yourself involves just a few simple steps, which you probably hear every day — it's commonplace advice, but it's important to heed it. Eat well, sleep well, take light exercise, get some presentable clothes for your date night. See? Simple. You don’t have to have a complete makeover, but it is good to make sure you're looking after yourself properly. A healthy body is the sign of a healthy mind, after all.

3: Master Your Social Skills
Good communication is one of the greatest skills you can develop — it will help make a great first impression, let you flirt comfortably, and generally improve your relationships with other people. If you want to know my secrets for successful communication, take a look at How to Communicate With Appeal. The clearer you are when you are talking, the more attractive you'll be to others — it even improves your appearance, since your well-spoken voice will compliment any effort that you've put into your clothes and hair. Projecting this kind of image will generally make you more attractive to everybody, and will give you even more of a chance at snagging your dream date!

Meeting the right kind of person can be fun, simple and easy. It’s just a matter of keeping yourself open to the right kind of experiences and taking the opportunity to develop yourself personally. And if you're not seeing instant improvements in your love life, don't fret — change and growth are always good things, even outside of a dating context. Remember the definition of madness: 'doing the same thing over and over, expecting a different result.' So go do and something different for a change! You won't regret it.

Until next week!