How to Keep the Spark in a Relationship Going
Tips to keep your partner (and yourself) interested
Finding the right kind of person for you is often the simplest part of the whole relationship process. Keeping the relationship interesting enough to make you both want to stick around is the tough part.
Relationships all go through a so-called 'honeymoon period', during which everything seems impossibly wonderful. Your partner has no flaws, there's no friction between you, and the days just seem to go by in a haze of perfection. The length of this period differs from couple to couple, with some saying that it ended after three weeks, some saying six months, and others over a year.
However long this honeymoon period may last, though, the truth is that it always comes to an end. Now, this isn't necessarily a bad thing - many relationships do just fizzle out after the initial chemistry wears off, since there isn't enough of a connection between both partners to sustain it.
But if you feel like you want to stick things out for the long run, here a few guidelines that you can follow to keep your relationship interesting and enjoyable.
1. Maintain the Mystery
Your partner didn't know much about you when you first met. Your past, your work friends and acquaintances, your exes, and everything else about your life was a complete mystery. So, if your relationship is still in the early stages, it's a wise move not to reveal every single detail of your life straight away. Keep an air of mystery about you - it's very alluring. That's obviously not to say that you shouldn't tell your partner anything about yourself (your relationship won't get far if you never say a word!), but just keep in mind that a slow trickle of information is much more interesting than one big, overwhelming wave of it. We all love a good mystery!
2. Make the Effort with Your Appearance
Try to stay as attractive as you where when you first met. Appearances aren't everything, and your partner should value you for more than just the way you look, but physical attraction is nonetheless a big part of any relationship. Don’t take a lazy attitude to your appearance just because you're in a settled relationship - keep making an effort to look your best, whatever that may mean for you. Remember: when you look great, you feel great!
3. Declare Independence
Yes, you're in a relationship. No, you haven't magically merged into one single person. It's important to keep some aspects of your life seperate from one another, and to maintain your own personal space. Keep up your hobbies by yourself - attend dance classes, write your novel, go jogging, play videogames, whatever appeals to you. Just set some time aside to do it on your own. The same goes for friends - not every outing has to include the two of you, and it can often be very relaxing to socialise without your partner. Having independent lives helps to sustain that air of personal mystery that I talked about earlier, and independence is always an attractive quality in its own right. Who likes a clingy boyfriend or girlfriend?
4. Keep it Creative
Keep that romantic, creative spark going. It's easy to settle into a routine in a long-term relationship, and while that brings a certain sense of contentment to many couples, it can also start to get a bit boring and monotonous at times. So make the effort to inject new concepts and plans into your date life. They don't have to be of epic proportion, just do something a little different to keep things interesting. Take her for a surprise picnic, randomly pay for his dinner in a restaurant, plan an entire day spent under the duvet covers... Think outside the box when it comes to planning how you are going to be spending time with your date. Basically, spring surprises just for the sake of it!
How have you coped with the end of the honeymoon period in the past? Have you any more tips you'd like to share with us?
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