People are quick to judge other people, and they decide on their first impressions very fast. Too fast, maybe. And this is doubly true when they're assessing someone they're thinking of dating!
Whether it's a good thing or a bad thing, the first thing we notice when we meet someone for the first time is how they look. You can actually tell a lot about somebody from their appearances, you know. Are they scruffy and unwashed? Neat and trouser-pressed? Wearing a nerdy t-shirt or a sporty one? Do they wear lots of makeup or just a little? Is their hair cropped and conservative or wild and outlandishly-coloured? Does their sense of style fit with your own? Some of these are small things, but initial impressions depend a lot on the details.
Whether it's instinct, or something that society has taught us, this kind of attitude isn't without its problems. I mean, if someone is overweight, should we judge them and call them lazy? Nope, I think not. So, at the other end of that scale, why should we presume that someone who's a dead ringer for Brad Pitt is the kindest, most loving, honest and loyal person in the world? The obvious answer: we shouldn't! But the truth is, everyone engages in this kind of behaviour to some degree - it's often hard not to pick film-star looks over average ones, the freshly-washed girl over the one wearing the week-old t-shirt, or the guy who looks like he's actually glanced in the mirror before he left the house over the one wearing two mis-matched shoes.
So the fact remains - appearances matter. They may not always represent who we are on the inside, but they do play a huge part in making a good first impression. This is even more important in the world of online dating, I think; since you've already had the chance to prove your great personality through messaging and chatting, now you've got to back that up with your physical presence.
Four Top Reasons for Dressing to Impress on the First Date!
1: Today, the style of dressing for a date is definitely more laid back. Don’t take that as an invitation to show up in a hoodie and many traines, though! I always feel that being subtly sexy is a sure-fire way to show your date that you take pride in how you look. Guys: wear a well-fitted shirt and a nice jumper or jacket with your jeans. Gals: follow suit with your favourite jeans and blouse, or slip into the most fabulous dress you've got!
2: You have high standards and you want your date to know that. The reason you want to dress to impress your date — aside from appeal — is that you want to show that you care. If you can't look after yourself, they're not going to think you're capable of being responsible for another person as well.
3: You want to let them know that the date was important to you, so put some time and effort into looking good for the occasion. If you took some time to choose an outfit, you're showing that the date is something special to you, and not just a way to kill some time.
4: Most importantly for yourself, we all know when we are dressed great we feel great! And if you're at your personal best, your first impressions will follow suit.
Eight Tips for Looking Good on the First Date!
1. Dress attractively but comfortably. Don't wear clothes that make you feel stiff or self-conscious - now's probably not the time to break out the bow ties or killer heels (unless they happen to be what you're comfortable in, of course!)
2. Be aware of your posture - it speaks volumes about you. You want to appear alert and confident by sitting up straight, and not slouching sullenly over your drink or meal.
3. Compliment your date. Not just with throwaway niceties like, 'I like your shirt'. Be sincere, and make an effort to notice something that he or she took time with. You just might get the favour returned!
4. Learn to flirt. Don't overdo it, though - coming on too strong is annoying at best, and downright creepy at worst.
5. Realize that you don't have to tell people how great you are - nobody like a boaster. It's better to show them instead, and if you've followed all my tips so far, you're probably looking pretty good!
6. Be interested and interesting. Listen actively to what your date says, and ask questions that show you're doing just that. Don't interrupt, though, as that's just plain rude.
7. Decide that you're going to enjoy yourself, no matter what. You may feel nervous and insecure, but letting that control the date just isn't going to end well. If you're easygoing, having a bit of fun, and willing to be spontaneous (even just a little bit), you can't help but make a great impression.
8. Always, always, always thank the other person for the date. Always. Got it? Good manners will get you everywhere, and there's a serious dearth of them in the dating world these days.
What about you? What's the first thing you notice about someone else? Anything you wish you'd done to make a better first impression in the past?